Hello my name is Monica. I am 45 years old, and I was born with a left club foot. I am from Colombia, and now I live in Las Vegas.
I was treated with casting and seven surgeries. I am so happy to find your website. I truly feel I am not alone. For the first time in my life I searched for a Clubfoot community, researched about the condition, causes, and post treatment.
Pain has been predominant throughout my entire life, I have a 5 inches leg discrepancy, my left leg being shorter and weaker, has put so much pressure on my right side. I even had a gastric sleeve surgery last year to help me control my weight since I thought my back pain was also related to my weight. I have never been obese, but last year I had a breakdown and put on 40 pounds. This year after traveling to Florida and sitting down for too long I have been in excruciating pain.
I am starting to accept that it is ok to feel pain and go through it. Since it is part of my condition, and I I don’t want to have more surgeries. Also, with only 20% of my stomach I can’t handle pain killers like before. It hurts my little stomach too much.
The way I was raised was very different from what I hear from other people’s sharing. My mother, never let me really relate to my foot. She always made me believe I was strong, and there was nothing wrong with me, and I was able to do anything, except, of course, wear high heals or open ballerina type of shoes since I have a size 3 and and a size 6 shoe sizes. I have grown with lots of resentment since every time I wanted to talk to my mom about my pain she would say, I was dramatic and wanted to call everyone’s attention by talking about it. I never felt heard. Fortunately, I married a wonderful man, and I have been in therapy for the past year after my gastric sleeve surgery. It has help me own myself. I forgave my mother, I no longer have a relationship with her, just a very polite communication.
I feel safe looking for help for my pain and talk about it. I am so glad I am hearing all your stories because having pain is part of this condition. I love showing my foot! It makes me feel strong , I owe that to my mother; “Never hide your foot!” -she used to tell me since I was little- Now I see that my true self doesn’t want to show my strength, but my vulnerability and that it is ok to feel.
I have found rock climbing helps me a lot stretching my back, I love the sport! Electric devises plugged to my back help control the pain, I’m trying for the first time CBD oil. I am open to hear any pain management ideas or is this it?
Thanks from the bottom of my heart!